Don’t stop when you’re tired. Stop when you’re done.

I think maybe people are out there wondering how we are doing? How are we managing with 4 kids under seven in a country where we don’t speak the language, where we are the new kids in town and we are one of the few foreigners in our neighborhood.

Mostly, I feel tired. Sometimes I feel one spilled glass of milk away from clinical insanity, but I know I will never fall off the deep end because God will be waiting right there at that moment to catch me. I feel God has been pulling us forward, and giving us the strength and opening the doors along the way.  I feel blessed to have my family, to know God and to be here in Japan. Life here in Japan can be rough, but it is often amazing and beautiful. But in the midst of it I don’t feel superhuman, I don’t feel brave or qualified to do any of the things I try to do everyday– to lead these kids, to be a decent wife and to live out my full purpose God has called me to. I am more tired in Japan then I have ever been before. I think its the constant thinking, walking, learning, socializing…being and surviving. The mothering, caring, loving, giving, thinking, feeling is never done. And won’t be until the day I die.

We came here with a mission to have hearts to serve those we meet and to have a students heart to learn all that we can while we are here. I have a strong tug in my heart to know people, to teach them and have them teach me. I never want to be in the middle of life alone and I believe God calls us to know one another, to be his hands and feet in loving and caring for others. We blame God for all the terrible things that happen in the world, but then we sit passive and never create change. We hold back from DOING and tell ourselves we are not qualified, need more education first, or that we are not the right person for the job. We fill our schedules so full that we have no time for other people, or we let our insecurities of what others might think of our faults and never get to know the person who lives right next door. What is the point of our existence if the only reason for living is to seek personal happiness, self-fulfillment and live a comfortable life? That is a terrible goal and people can waste their whole life seeking out things that will really never give them true joy or contentment. They invest their time and money into things that do not matter, but the only thing that matters are people.

I love the positive reactions from those I meet here in Japan when I tell them I am interested in learning about them and their culture. I want to take this time to learn how to make my relationships less about me and more about the other person. I want to broaden my life and expand my horizons, to know how others live and what they love the most, what they struggle with. I want to relate, I want to grieve with others in hard times and rejoice with them in happy times. When I make it more about them and less about me, somehow my life is more full. And you don’t have to move to Japan to do the same.

I want to encourage you to take to heart Romans 12:

A Living Sacrifice to God

12 And so, dear brothers and sisters,^[a] I plead with you to give your bodies to God because of all he has done for you. Let them be a living and holy sacrifice—the kind he will find acceptable. This is truly the way to worship him.^[b] 2 Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.

³ Because of the privilege and authority^[c] God has given me, I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us.^[d] 4 Just as our bodies have many parts and each part has a special function, ⁵ so it is with Christ’s body. We are many parts of one body, and we all belong to each other.

⁶ In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. ⁷ If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. ⁸ If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly.

⁹ Don’t just pretend to love others. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Hold tightly to what is good. ¹⁰ Love each other with genuine affection,^[e] and take delight in honoring each other. ¹¹ Never be lazy, but work hard and serve the Lord enthusiastically.^[f] 12 Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying. ¹³ When God’s people are in need, be ready to help them. Always be eager to practice hospitality.

¹⁴ Bless those who persecute you. Don’t curse them; pray that God will bless them. ¹⁵ Be happy with those who are happy, and weep with those who weep. ¹⁶ Live in harmony with each other. Don’t be too proud to enjoy the company of ordinary people. And don’t think you know it all!

But a funny thing has been happening, I have been the one on the receiving end. I have been invited into peoples homes, extended hands have reached out to help me when I have had no clue how to get something done. We have had a very warm welcome from the local church and met people whose kindness has helped me get through my day. Our American neighbors baked the girls a birthday cake and fed us dinner, a simple gesture that filled us back up just by being thought of. I was invited to a bible study and felt the warmth of God’s love handed over right from the invite. I am blessed through the Japanese mothers who get out of their comfort zones and speak English to me, just to ask if I need anything or to explain to me all the things I need to figure our for school (like recently getting them ready for swimming).

It has been a whirlwind and kid tornadoes follow me around wherever I go. Alot of my time is filled with less meaningful tasks, such as laundry and grocery shopping. I get angry too easily and fall asleep in the middle of studying my Japanese. I spend too much money and waste alot of time on my cell phone.  But we are doing well and the deep waters of Japan haven’t taken us under, but are teaching us how to be better swimmers– and as I remember that it isn’t about what I can get out of it all, but how do I come alongside those I meet and live life with them, all the rest falls into place.

I have to part with an Andy Mineo quote from his song  “Uncomfortable”:

“So if you wanna live a comfortable life
Make sure you never love nobody, be selfish and never sacrifice”